Studs Up

This has been a hell of a confusing World Cup so far. Unprecedented excitement, unprecedented coverage, unprecedented sense of fandom as people relentlessly interact via Facebook, Twitter and whatever else we can use to complain about Vuvuzelas or point out that Howard Webb is as much a cock in international games as he is in the Premier League.

It’s amazing.

Yet at the same time, it sucks hairy balls. Why? No doubt you’ve already guessed it’s the freakin’ vuvuzela, or as I like to call it “Satan’s Anal Trumpet”. I’m sure all the drunken masses in South Africa are having a blast defeaning each other, but it the sound is pushing me to the limits of my sanity as I have to put up with it for 6 hours of football every day.

Let me quantify this by saying that I own a vuvuzela. The South Africa tourism board sent me one as a promotional item for Studs Up. It is fun as f**k to blow it in people’s faces and annoy the shit out of them. But now I am the one being annoyed the shit out of, and it is as annoying as SHIT.

UPDATE: Zidane agrees with me.

What’s worse is the crowd noise is turned down completely by the broadcasters so half the time when a goal is scored I think it’s offside because no one is cheering. Only they are. The sound has just been turned down in order to reduce the vuvuzela noise, which is drowning out the cheering anyway.

The football has been a bit crap too, but that’s due to the first round as everyone’s trying to at least pick up a point and get some momentum. I thoroughly expect the second round to be full of tasty scorelines since the first round draws means everyone’s got to go for it in the next two games.

Complex Magazine asked me to contribute some picks for their blogger roundtable (plus one cartoonist?). I picked France to make a surprising run (against their horrific infighting) and Brazil to eventually win their most pragmatic World Cup ever. The first round draw with Uruguay has kept my France “sleeper” pick alive while Brazil’s less than inspired win, but win nonetheless, against North Korea has me looking in good shape there too.

UPDATE: France suck. I’m a FOOL.

My excitement for the World Cup remains unfettered, despite the best efforts of the teams and organising committees involved to completely ruin it for anyone who isn’t at the tournament. Great way to grow the game, guys.